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Apple Announces the iCaplet

San Francisco, CA, 1/27/10, 12:28PM EST – Apple Inc. surprised the world today unveiling its newest device, the iCaplet – a small pill embossed with the Apple logo. Media and fans were sent into a frenzy of excitement and confusion. The world had expected the iTablet – a thin netbook sized computer which would revolutionize print media the way that iPods and iPhones had reinvented music and smart phones.

Apple's iCaplet (actual size.)

With the crowd at the Yerba Buena Center both cheering and booing, Apple CEO Steve Jobs, held sway saying, “Now, this is the coolest thing I have ever done! This device is amazing and it will change your life! I know you expected a tablet based computer but the more we studied it the more we couldn’t see the value in something bigger than a cell phone and smaller than a laptop. I mean, come on, WTF?! You don’t need that, trust me, I looked into it. What you need is the iCaplet. You swallow this, wait a minute for it to boot up your system, and then the whole world opens up. It enables you to read books and magazines, it helps you turn pages. Music, what about music? Yes, it does music. All the music you have ever heard in your life, brought with you, where ever you go. You can sing it at the top of your lungs or if in a crowd and discretion is advised the iCaplet will enable you to hum it inside you head. That’s right, I did just say that – it creates a world where you can hear music inside your head without others around you hearing it. Amazing, and only from Apple. That’s the iCaplet, our first product that lets you take a bit of Apple inside you, where ever you go.”

Jobs then brought out Jonathan Ive, Apple’s Senior Vice President of Industrial Design, who explained how Apple was able to get all of its technology and expertise into a device the size of a pill of aspirin. Won over, the crowd couldn’t wait to get out and get a taste of this new device. But, as is usually the case, there was Jobs’, “… and one more thing.” What was it? The iCaplet not only lets you leave your computers, interact with people, and go out into the world, it also can cure the common headache.

The iCaplet is available immediately at all Apple stores. It will be sold in blister packs of two, six, and eight. It will also be available in bottles of 50, 100, and 250 next month.

One Comment

  1. Cpt. K

    LMAO! Quality.

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